When I started this little blog, it was really just a way to record memories of my little girl's milestones. I never dreamed when I wrote the first blog post that a few months later I'd be announcing our second {unplanned} addition. And really, this just became a place to get my thoughts out of my head. I've often thought about my internal thoughts as a burden, because I worry and overthink, and writing about that helps me. I share that with others, because maybe their thoughts weigh them down too.
Friday, our big girl was excitedly telling me all about her life's goals. She's dreamed of becoming an engineer for a while now. To add to that though, she told me she wanted at least 4-5 kids and she wanted to write Bible studies. She wouldn't charge me for her studies, so I could use them with my ladies group. Sweet, right? :)
As she eagerly told me these dreams, I was seriously impressed that my 10 year old had thought of all the details she had planned, but I candidly told her, maybe sometimes the dreams she has might not be the ones God has planned for her.
I have always had big dreams, but somewhere along the way, I became a very practical person. I love kids and I love being a teacher, but part of the reason I decided to become a teacher was in the very rural community I grew up in, I knew I'd be able to find a job. I honestly feel ill equipped to be a teacher at times, because school was really easy for me. I didn't have to grapple or work hard and I worry that I will never reach all my students because of that. However, because I did love school so much, I'm always excited to make school their safe place, a place where learning is fun, and learn new ways to help all my students. My mom was a really amazing teacher, and I'm happy I get to follow in her {impossible to fill} footsteps.
I sometimes wonder if I should have dreams outside the four walls of my classroom, but today I was driving home from church and I thought about the students who sit down in my classroom this year. I'm certain that I was meant to learn something from them. And hopefully teach them a few things too. When I went home in June, I fully anticipated going back into my 3rd grade classroom. In mid June, it looked like I would teach a 1st and 2nd grade combination class. In August, I was given the news it could be Kinder/1st or maybe a 2nd/3rd. I took a deep breath, and said, "I would really like the 2/3." And just so happened that stuck. To all my teacher friends who have tackled any combination class, you're educational rockstars, because it's hard work. I'm constantly chasing my tail, just like Millie girl. But I'm certain that this was His plan.
Was it mine? Not really. But of course, being a stepmother, having the girls 13 months apart, moving my girls during their elementary school years, tackling every grade from kindergarten to 5th weren't either. If my girl doesn't become an engineer, it'll be okay. If she asks me to order the Bible studies she writes from Amazon, I will ;) I just hope to instill in her that big dreams are wonderful. Following the Lord's calling might pull us away from those dreams a bit. It might seem practical, it might be scary, it might be something we aren't really qualified for, but it really might be just where we are meant to be.
